I Knew This Was Going To Happen

Recently, I was treated for a serious staph infection, and for the uninitiated, if left untreated, staph infections can lead to all sorts of fun.  OK, NOT fun, but, what am I if not facetious?

 

Sepsis!  Yay Sepsis!

 

 

Anyway...

 

 

Two weeks of very strong oral antibiotics and one IV cocktail, also very strong, killed EVERYTHING. 

 

 

Good, right?  Everything bad in my body was killed. 

 

 

Alas, and, I knew this was going to happen, everything GOOD was also killed in the fray.  All the little micro-organisms that say, "Yes, you can eat that/wear that/spray yourself with that/rub that all over yourself!  No problem!  We got this!  We eat that stuff for lunch!  Yay Buffet!" now lay dead on the battlefield.  Without those, my body is acting like it is allergic to everything.

 

 

Nice.

 

 

I must tell you that my first inclination was to move to a mountaintop and live the life of a hermit, just bathing in the river and using none of the fine, fine products that our chemical industry has produced in the last 50 years, stay up there for a couple of months until I'm good and funky again, then return to the world of Better Living Through Science.  Yep, just me and a stack of notebooks and pens.

 

Sadly, I have a job, and my children are not big fans of chopping firewood, so, we stay in the big city, where the shower, antihistamines and pro-biotics are located.  And I better get normal again soon, or I'm going to freak out.  By the way?  Freaking out ALSO causes an allergic reaction!  Oh, the irony...someone like me, brain running a million miles an hour all the time, who basically CAN'T chill out without some kind of chemical intervention, gets told to "go home and relax".  Sure...I'll get right on that.