Monday, November 2, 2009

Would I? Should I?

I'll give it a shot.  But I'm not joining anything, so nobody better step on my head if they notice that sometime around, oh, November 4th, there isn't a blog post.


Welcome to November, where, in theory, everybody who has a blog posts a blog every single day for the entire month.


Personally, I worry about what I could possibly talk about.  Expect tangents.  Oh, and can we talk about cute boys and stuff?  Because my brain tends to hover on a few specific things: Deep thoughts, food, stupid and/or annoying people, and cute boys—in no particular order.  Sometimes, one of those takes over.  And sometimes the stupid and/or annoying person IS a cute boy, and almost always, the stupid and/or annoying person spurs a deep thought, because I'm just here to help.
Let's see what we have here:


Last night, my daughter and I watched The Girls Next Door and that Lorenzo Lamas reality show.  Back to Back.


STILL ALIVE!!  Woooooo-Hoooooo!


The Girls Next Door went "camping" in the backyard of the Playboy Mansion, which involved them setting up a tent (badly) and telling ghost stories while a succession of butlers brought them food (and hopefully cleaned up the horrendous mess they left out by the pool—my gaaawd, what PIGS!).  Then the sprinkler came on and everybody returned to the mansion.  Were I would normally take this opportunity to call them a bunch of pussy's, I think it might be inappropriate in this situation.


Now then…do we categorize this as "stupid"?  Or, "annoying"?  Both?  Anyone up for making those whacky situations reality "stars" get themselves into be a little less contrived?  I mean, less contrived than three hot chicks sharing a 70-odd year old "boyfriend"?  I used to like that show, when it was the other three hot chicks sharing the 70-odd year old "boyfriend".  Sure, there were whacky situations, but, at least all three of those ladies appeared to have brain cells in working order.  These three?  Not so much.


My brain cell barometer is a person's ability to set up a tent, by the way…if you are defeated by a tent, then you have no honor…




OhMyGawd, I cannot BELIEVE I am critiquing a reality show!  See what happens in November?  "Write something every day…" Jeeeeez…


After I excused myself for large chunks of the fake camping experience, I returned to the living room in time to watch Lorenzo Lamas take his hot daughter with him to the motorcycle rally in Sturgis, where he was (rightfully) concerned about the possibility of her running around in ass-less leather chaps and getting into trouble.  He used the word "dangerous".  Yes, I think we can agree with that—couple of clueless hot chicks with lots of wiggle in their walks, surrounded by drunken horny guys?  Danger!  Danger! (Cut to shot of daughter and friend modeling ass-less leather chaps and wondering why the assembled crowd of men is ogling them).


OK….stupid?  Or annoying?




By the way, there are no prizes, but, voting is free, so go nuts.



I am not among those who blame reality TV for dumbing down America.  Never mind the fact that I have an IQ of 158—I could have an IQ of 73 and feel like a genius compared to some of the people on these shows.  You see, reality TV is here to make us feel BETTER about the fact that we are not hapless, helpless ding-bats.  And reality TV is doing a BANG-UP job, people.  That's right, as much as watching Spencer and Heidi makes me cringe, I do feel better about myself after every single episode of The Hills.  Why?  Because it appears that they have no discernable skills, meaning that they won't be competing with me for a job any time in the future.  Isn't that AWESOME?  Also, I know that eventually, these people won't be cute anymore, and that things on their bodies will start to sag, and when that happens they'll have literally nothing going for them, so, it's best for them to make their money now, then invest well and go into seclusion.  Please.  I'm begging you.  Go into seclusion.
Also, I can't picture any one of them being smart enough to hook three hot girlfriends when they are in their 70's.  I'm just sayin'.








Are you SURE you want me to write something every single day of November?  Really, really sure?  Cuz this is the stuff that comes out, you know…







Tomorrow, let's talk about boys!  Throw me some names—gimme the ones you like, and I'll see if they compare to the one(s) I like…and after that heated discussion, I'll see if I have enough recipes to fill the rest of the month.


  1. Who are Heidi and Spencer and what are The Hills? heh. I like to SOUND like I am so TV illiterate. But speaking as a DWTS addict who tweets about it every week, I cannot get away with that. :)

    I have no boy names to toss you. *hangs head in shame*

    Oh I have my celebrity boyfriends. But I hold them close to the vest. ;) Admittedly, they are boring and old fashioned and old school...

  2. Ahem! There will be no holding celebrity boyfriends close to the vest! None of that! Spill!

    I can't bring myself to watch Dancing With The Stars, or American Idol, or any of those. And I wouldn't watch anything but Criminal Minds, Modern Marvels and Mythbusters if I didn't have teenagers. And Law and Order, Criminal Intent, because of the cute let's start there, shall we? Vincent D'Onofrio? Chris Noth? Anyone? Anyone?

  3. I can put up a tent - with a little help. Is there an award for this? How about if I can put up a tent - with a little help - in the wilderness?

    I have no shame in saying my celebrity crush is on George Clooney. Has been since Facts of Life...

  4. Assuming you can put up a tent without help from a butler, you're IN!

    You many people make fun of George's Facts of Life days, but I gotta tell ya, the man's never had an un-pretty day in his entire career. I've never really crushed on him, though, because he's more brotherly to me...just a thing.

  5. Here's the thing, I was TOTALLY going to do a 30 day thing this month, but I wasn't going to mention it cause I didn't want the pressure...then I forgot to post Monday. What kind of dork misses the FIRST day??? Bleh.....whatever.

  6. Ally, just blame the time difference and slap it on there--nobody in the States would notice! :-)

    I notice you ALSO failed to mention a cute boy/celebrity boyfriend name! Hmmm...might have to put that post off a couple of days...

  7. Don't you post most days anyway? You're prolific - should be a piece of cake! This is my 4th year doing may kill me this time around.

  8. There is only one boy I'd sell my children for...Lenny Kravitz. Others that I would consider on days where they drive me crazy....

    1. Taylor Kitsch-AKA Tim Riggins from Friday Night Lights
    2.Javier Bardem - I know, kind of weird looking but yumm-o!
    3.Shemar Moore - dear god this boy makes me weak in the knees.
    4.Michael C. Hall - from dexter NOT Michael Anthony Hall from 16 Candles.
    5. Simon Baker...this is a new addition to the list because I've been watching the Mentalist a lot lately.!

  9. OK, Shemar? Holy Mother that man is beautiful...I mean, RIDICULOUSLY gorgeous. Not of this earth!

    Lenny has always been sexy as hell...

    I don't know some of these other think Michael C. Hall is hot? Hmmm...I think he is "interesting", which is to say, not someone I would drool over, but would love to hang with. Simon Baker does zip for me for some reason. Weird...

  10. Vikki--so far, doing OK! I'll just talk about Enter the Haggis every day until next Wednesday, and that will help...HA! Just kidding.

  11. Wait...wait...Javier is cute. And BONUS! His name is Javier...LOL

  12. I think it's the character with Simon and his his voice.. The Tim Riggins is DEFINITELY the character...every guy I ever dated or wanted to date in my teen and twenties, brooding and distant, with a side of alcoholic. Michael C Hall just yanks my chain I have NO idea why.


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