A lady who works in my office has what I call the Classic Midwestern Wife/Mom Duty Gene.
Sometimes, you don't recognize it in a person right away. Sometimes, you have to close in on a holiday before it becomes evident. Case in point: Today, the topic of her Resigned to Duty monologue was Thanksgiving.
She described "her" upcoming Thanksgiving, indicating that (of course) she would be hosting and not only did she have to do all the cooking, but also, she has a dog and several of the family members attending also have dogs and (of course) everyone would be bringing their dogs along for the visit, thus creating a situation in which there would be SIX dogs on hand for that 4th Thursday, and What A Time that will be!
Please note, Duty makes no effort to tell people to leave their dogs at home, or hell, even contribute to the food in any way. Duty only sighs and says, "It's going to be a madhouse, but somehow I will manage to not only cook a four course meal for 30 people, but also maintain order in a house full of large, furry creatures who are trying to simultaneously eat off of everyone's plates and smell each other's butts."
Any time I think myself a martyr (which is often, I might add), I need only consider those Duty-Bound wives and mothers. Are they better wives or mothers because they take all of this upon themselves and heap on the "duties" while accepting or soliciting no help from anyone?
I think that's open for debate.
Look at it this way--if they didn't get something out of it, they wouldn't do it. Of course they want to make all the food! Why? So that all compliments about food will be directed at them and not at someone else!
Anyway...I'm thinking restaurant for Thanksgiving this year--does that make me a bad person?
I bet people who own restaurants think I'm awesome...