Saturday, June 26, 2010

As Movies Go, It's Rather Depressing

Eleventy million years ago, there was a song I heard that was something like "sure could use a little good news today..."

Anyone?  Anyone?  This was back when I was a teenager, so, the late 1840's?**

This morning, while talking to my best friend, I realized that I am virtually starving for good news. Starving, I tell you!  I'm so starved that even other people's good news doesn't dent the armor these days (except Ghana's performance in the World Cup today--my friend from work is from Ghana, and since I don't follow the game, I am glad that her team won.  Yes, I do know that they were playing USA...).

In the last couple of weeks, I have gone from feeling really good about a couple of situations to feeling like--well, I don't feel crappy, necessarily, but definitely not fantastic.  Instead of getting a promotion at work, I believe that the new boss would be much happier if I would jump off a cliff and/or crawl in a hole and disappear--whatever it takes for me to be nowhere near him for the rest of forever.  I mean, I'm fairly certain that during our last conversation he indicated that smart people offend him--so I'm pretty much screwed.  At the (exact) same time, I finally figured out a way to talk to the cute boy I've been crushing on forever, and it turns out that he and my boss are pretty much on the same page, and apparently I'm reading a completely different book--a book which might as well be about elves and dragons, considering how full of fantasy it is.

Raises.  Cute boys.  What the hell was I thinking?  Why would a boss or any guy want someone around who is smart and interesting, takes care of herself, is hardworking, respectful and most of all, loyal?  Yeah...that's some crazy talk right there.

Of course, the cute boy thing is total back-burner stuff compared to OH-MY-EFFING-GOD!  Is Mr. Hates Smart People gonna fire my ass or what?  Cute boys are nice and all, but only a complete idiot relies on them for their next meal.  You can blow it off when a guy doesn't like your approach, but when it's your boss?  F*ck.  You're screwed.  What sucks most is that it's one of those "we're taking the department in a different direction" things, so the new boss walked into the place determined to completely change everything whether it was working or not.  Not a hell of a lot you can do in those situations--just a huge bummer to have had put in a lot of hard work and have it all be for nothing.  Nothing, and I mean NOTHING sucks worse than having your livelihood in the hands of someone who doesn't give a shit about your livelihood.  That just flat-out sucks.  Last time I went through that, it was eerily similar in that I was invited to interview for a promotion and didn't get it.  Two weeks later?  Fired.  F*ck.

The only thing missing is an expensive car repair.  Or kidney failure.  Kidney failure costs a lot of money and puts one in a wildly unattractive state, right?  Then that's the next logical thing.

I'm still trying to figure out what I did to earn the vicious Karma stomp, but I guess it doesn't really matter--picking up and starting over from zero appears to have become my specialty.  Imagine the hell of it if I wasn't completely full of myself--uh, I mean, steeped in confidence. continues to be interesting.  I wish it was more 'romantic comedy' interesting and less 'Schindler's List' interesting, but, oh well...all movies come equipped with heroes, right?

**Oh alright then! It was Anne Murray, A Little Good News, and it was 1983. Happy now?

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