Mostly Shopping. And Some Poop.

• I'm not entirely sure, but I believe it's possible that I may need a nickel plated toaster.  How could I not need this?  $90?  All day!  Ahem....oh....mygawd, how much money do you need to be swimming in before you would piss away $90 for a toaster?  How shallow your love for toast must be if you can only eat toast from a ridiculously expensive toaster.  And that thing is on clearance!  Normally $140.  Yikes. 
• However, I would like it known that I would have no problem whatsoever spending full price for that countertop wine cooler. 
• Oh, what the hell, since I'm all Smart Bargaining today, here's another--effing love this. 
• Had to check the calendar this morning when I walked into the ladies room here at the office and the whole place reeked of Aqua Net--thought I was back in the '80's.  Never mind the fact that it was Aqua Net, let's just focus on the fact that someone was engaging in extensive personal grooming, right there in the public bathroom in an office building--make-up bag open and spilled all over the sink and everything.  Again....yikes.
• I took the cat to the vet the other day, because he was acting all "I'm fixin' to die" and honestly, I was prepared for someone to tell me it was time, but the vet was quite optimistic in spite of the fact that Bailey was a complete and total ASSHOLE for the entire visit.  (Seriously, I walked out of that office and was on the phone to my daughter before I even made it all the way to the car, just so I could express to her what a fucking jerk her cat was, with the howling and the growling and the hissing and the spitting and the biting and scratching...THE ENTIRE TIME WE WERE THERE.  What a good sport that doctor was.)  Anyway, one steroid shot and food change later, Bailey has gone from "I'm fixin' to die" to "I'm FINE, already!  Stop watching me poop!"  Jerk.  Yeah, that's right--I said it.  I saved your life, you fucking jerk.  That poop cost me $150--don't think I won't be inspecting it.
• Thanks to my friend Mellie Mel for sharing what is essentially the final Alexander McQueen--I'll link to her post for the pics rather than putting them here, so go there if you want to check out the cool-ass clothes.  The man had an incredible brain, and an enormous talent for making Wow.  It is hard to fathom, with a talent like that, and a vision so strong, that ending his own life would have ever made sense to him.  An absolute tragedy.  It occurs to me as I look at the clothes that a lot of people would look at that and think, "I could never wear that" and maybe you wouldn't--maybe I wouldn't either.  But in ALL THINGS, it is the visionary that gives the rest of us permission to move forward.  To introduce new shapes, new colors, new technique, new sound--to be the one that says, "Fuck it, I'm going to try _____".  That's where the true beauty lies.  In fearlessness.  Without it, not a one of us will ever go anywhere but backwards.

Did Anyone Notice?

That the blog is starting to match the rug in my living room?

Here's a refresher photo...



One line at a time, you know....this is what happens when it's slow at work and you're stuck in front of a computer....

What I Know

How come when somebody sits down and reads a year's worth of archival material from this blog, I don't automatically think "Gee, I must be pretty interesting," but rather, "What do you WANT, Crazy Stalker???"

 

 

Of course, there is always the brief mental review to make sure that there is nothing in there for which I could be sued.

 

 

Then I have to go back and actually read it all, just to make sure it's not too embarrassing.  Good thing I nuked most of that archive. 

 

And, probably that thing about Tom Cruise won't come back to bite me in the ass.

 

 

Can I just say, that as much as I enjoy reading other people's stuff that I have never, and I mean, NEVER thought anyone's writing was so awesome that I spent a day archive diving on their blog?  If I read your stuff, and I read ALL of your stuff, trust me, I was looking for specific information.

 

 

Not that there aren't incredibly wonderful people and writers out there, just...you don't do that, you know?  You don't dig that way just trying to read my boring-ass day-to-day observations, or anybody else's, even if their lives are a million times more interesting than mine.

 

"Ouch" if you did, though.

 

 

I may be the Queen of the Ridiculously Obsessive Internet Search.  Well, I thought I was.  I mean...can find out a hell of a lot of stuff about someone because I'm what you call "determined", but, I've never plundered any "outside the public domain" stuff, never paid for someone to find Vincent D'Onofrio's home address or any other stupid shit like that.  Why would I?

 

Recently, a random person told me a micro-factoid about someone and all I could think was, "How in the hell do you know that?  Or, more importantly, WHY in the hell do you know that?"  I mean, at what point would somebody think that the name of some celebrity's kid's school, or anything pertaining to their family, was going to be useful? 

 

I don't mind telling you, it kinda creeped me out...

 

 

Because I am a digger myself, I recognize digging.  Because my family is a part of my "product", I accept a certain level of risk, but I only do this because, like I said, we're interesting, but not interesting on a national scale, or even a regional one.  Probably nobody cares enough to show up on my front steps to tell me that they've just come from the grave of my maternal grandfather and what an incredibly moving experience it was.  And probably my days of random strangers acting like I'm their best friend are long gone.

 

 

Or are they?

 

 

By the way, if you're looking for anything useful about some celebrity, the blog isn't going to be of much help to you, considering that the only person about whom I speak extensively is me.  Write what you know, right kids?