Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Eye Roll Injury

Minnesotans have this thing where we say, "Oh fer dumb"

Yes...that *is* how we say it. "Fer." 

FER, as in fur.

Hopefully it is self-exploratory but to those just waking up, we say it when we think something is dumb.

And we don't notice we're saying it but if someone played us back a recording of ourselves talking and we heard it a hundred times from our own lips (a low-ball estimate) we would be mortified.

I tried to train myself to say, "That's just fucking stupid," instead, but there are a surprisingly large number of situations that don't allow for you to say, "That's just fucking stupid."

Oh fer dumb.

Social media, the place where "oh fer dumb" is perhaps most called for, what with its bottomless pit of dumb, is not a welcoming place for either the phrase itself, nor the preferred, "That's just fucking stupid."

People react so strangely, as if you've insulted them in some way.

Fer dumb!

(Hang on...we have to wait while all the people from other countries check to see if Duo Lingo offers a course in Minnesota-speak.)

And we're back!

I tried, "Insert eye roll," which I thought was genius with its gentle visual humor and slight ambiguity, but found as things got stupider and stupider I had to perform harder and harder virtual eye rolls until eventually I was virtually injuring myself from virtually rolling my eyes so hard.

And that, I think we can all agree, is just fucking stupid.


No shortage of dumb, and no shortage of people calling it out. No shortage of people wanting to call it out but afraid to, and thankfully no shortage of smarter-than-me folks to do the heavy hilarious quip lifting in that arena while I sit and wish I would have thought of that line.

Fer dumb.

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