Shhhh...Not A Word!

So....

 

Starting a new thing.  I'm totally NOT excited about it, and wish it was not a necessary evil, but alas...

 

 

...my body is no longer convinced that a Little Debbie Nutty Bar and a Diet Pepsi pass for a "meal".

 

 

You see, back when I was a smoker, this was not a big deal.  Coffee and a cigarette for breakfast, Nutty Bars and other goodies all day long.  Beer, Soda, etc., and a cigarette between each item.  Never got above a Buck-Fifty, and I never exercised.  (I mean, I'm an active person, but I wouldn't go out of my way to "exercise".)

 

 

Funny what happens when you stop pumping amphetamines into your system.

 

(Insert image of a puffer-fish here)

 

 

So, with some great help, I've entered the world of studying calories and carbs and protein and fat and blah, blah, blah.

 

 

The good news is that 5 pounds just FELL off of me.  Like, literally, in three days, gone.  Whammo!

 

The bad news is that that dramatic drop was most certainly a fluke and that I will be reaching my goal in increments of 1 instead of increments of 5.

 

 

The other good news is that I'm actually eating a lot of food and I'm not at all hungry, even though this is a pretty extreme calorie reduction, so while I'm not cursing the lack of food, I am cursing the fact that I have to think about it...because not only do I have the patience of a gnat, I'm also stubborn and don't like to be told what to do. 

 

My "You're Not The Boss Of Me" wants a beer, is all I'm saying.

 

Actually my "You're Not The Boss Of Me" figured the occasional beer into the calorie count--call it a "snack", if you will...

 

 

I am approaching this "losing weight" thing with the same diligence that I apply to everything else I do.  I'm nothing if not disgustingly thorough.  Don't worry, I'm not going to any dangerous extremes--I still refuse to "exercise", for example.  (I would take a walk for fun, or for fresh air, but DAMN-IT!  Do NOT try to tie it into losing weight or I will FREAK OUT.) 

 

If I do this properly, I may still be able to convince my psyche that I'm just as invincible now as I was at this time last year, so we have to be very, very careful how we speak of The Food Thing, if we speak of it at all...I've been all "We've ALWAYS liked carrots!" for a week now, and so far, she has no idea what's happening...